Tim has actually taken the time to name each individual beard strand. Tim didn't know what he was getting in to because what Tim found was that by naming each beard strand the beard became even more personal and now feels compelled to hold mass each time one falls out and dies....between ccom and his beard Tim has no personal time.
FUN FACTOID
Tim has named 12 of his 40,218 beard strands Tim I through Tim XII
On the first day The Beard created tobacco. On the second day The Beard fermented the tobacco. On the third day the beard rolled the tobacco into a cigar, and The Beard saw how good it was. On the fourth day The Beard let the cigar "rest". On the fifth day, The Beard let the cigar "age". On the 6th day The Beard created Tim, and on the seventh day, after so much work, The Beard relaxed and smoked it's cigar through Tim. All hail The Beard!!
Thought I'd post my own beard pic....my beard was rather thin at that time; it's gotten thicker now. Only have a goatee now, and even thAt is technically against company policy.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Wow, this just took one of those unexpected and wierd twists that I didn't expect and makes you feel uncomfortable.
I thought you would be used to it by now gypsy. There's a pretty good argument for most of the guys here to be locked up in the looney bin and it's not so bad here once you get used to the padded walls and Nurse Ratched.
And to the relevancy of the thread, Tim's Beard gave Jesus the gift of Beard.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Tim's beard had a pet Cobra named Beverly. He would take it for walks in the park and even taught it to answer the phone. One day, Beverly bit the maid. So, with tears in his eyes, Tim's Beard shot the maid!
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim tried to get The Beard to take out the garbage? (last night, I tried to kill myself again) Anyway, Tim's Beard is sitting on the couch and Tim tells The Beard to take out the garbage. The Beard punches Tim in the face, throws him in a bag and drops him on the curb and says, "There Tim, I took out the garbage!"
Tim's Beard drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls!
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
Comments
FUN FACTOID
Tim has named 12 of his 40,218 beard strands Tim I through Tim XII
In The Beginning there was The Beard. In The End there will only be The Beard.
Whosoever believeth in me shall not lack for the ecstasy of premium cigars...so sayeth The Beard.
CONTENTS
Worlds Doomsday Seed Vault, containing seeds from around the globe
10 of Tims beard strands
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim's Beard forced me to wear a woman's bikini? Well anyway, Tim's Beard tears off my clothes and forces me to wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing only a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily, but Ill be damned if at the end of the quarter my sales hadn't tripled.
And to the relevancy of the thread, Tim's Beard gave Jesus the gift of Beard.
Did I ever tell you about the time Tim tried to get The Beard to take out the garbage? (last night, I tried to kill myself again) Anyway, Tim's Beard is sitting on the couch and Tim tells The Beard to take out the garbage. The Beard punches Tim in the face, throws him in a bag and drops him on the curb and says, "There Tim, I took out the garbage!"
Tim's Beard drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls!
I completed the shave without any problems.
Thankfully, I do not have Tims Beard!