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this year

kuzi16kuzi16 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 14,471
in a few posts i have alluded to how terrible this year has been.
it is easily the worst year i have ever had

Jan 17th i was in a car accident. some kid hit me from behind. some damage to my car but i am now in constant pain through the length of my back. I have a lawyer on that, but the pain is constant and at its very best annoying.

then, on Jan 31st, i come home from work and my wife tells me that she is leaving me. I had no clue that there was an issue even close to this. I suggested counseling but she would have nothing to do with it. she left that night.
the papers for the dissolution arrived a few days later. i have seen her once since then. i have no real idea why she left beyond "we are headed in two different directions," and i have no idea why she is willing to end 13 years together without seeking professional help.
ive hired another lawyer to deal with the legal aspects. we are trying to keep it amicable because we both have too much to lose if it goes over to a "divorce" and not a "dissolution".

so as it stands, this year has been full of emotional and physical pain.
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Comments

  • EulogyEulogy Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,295
    I'm sorry to hear that Kuzi. I'm going through a divorce right now too. It was a 15 year relationship, for me. It sucks, but try and keep a positive attitude and talk to someone if it gets to unbearable. Hopefully, the rest of the year gets better.
  • HaysHays Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,262
    Oh my god Matt, I´m so sorry to hear this. Even with your earlier comments (and double-checking your Facebook, at that) I had no idea it was like this. I know there isn´t a thing I can do for you, but know that you´re in my thoughts and prayers bro.
  • smoke em if you got emsmoke em if you got em Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,119
    Matt...crazy thread brother but happy that you trust in this forum enough to let us into your personal life a bit. Cant say that Ive ever been through any of the situations you are currently going through but I can say that life takes us all on some intresting journeys from time to time. I wish you all the best and look forward to having you back on the forum full time when the time is right. The good ones will still be here with you get back.

    Stay strong...I'll be praying for you and your wife.
  • roland_7707roland_7707 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,647
    Matt, i am praying that this gets better for you soon. If I can do anything, let me know.
  • LiquidChaos66LiquidChaos66 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,603
    Sorry to hear all this! :( You've got my prayers and thoughts on your way! I know we don't communicate much but if you need someone to vent to or talk with feel free to message me. never hurts to have an extra person to talk to if you need it.
  • MartelMartel Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,423
    Matt,

    That all sucks, man. Sorry to hear. You'll be in my prayers. I'll just echo what others have said. We care about you here. Let me know if I can do anything to help.
  • blutattooblutattoo Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,100
    Divorce was just as hard emotionally for me as having a family member die, especially when you are not expecting it. It overwhelmed me at times. If there is anything I can do just let me know. My heart goes out to you brother.
  • wwhwangwwhwang Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,863
    Holy crap, Matt. I thought it was bad, but not that bad. I'm really sorry to hear about the constant pain and surprise separation. I know there's not much I can do, but lemme know if you want to talk.
  • matkn293matkn293 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,277
    Sorry to hear this Matt! I semi went through the separation/divorce thing last year. Luckily we were able to work it out. Cannot imagine the feelings when its sudden or moving forward. Good luck brother!
  • First WarriorFirst Warrior Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 707
    Matt, one day at a time. Treat yourself well at this time.
  • PatrickbrickPatrickbrick Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 808
    I am very sorry that this has happened to you, hang in there sir eventually better things will come.
  • The3StogiesThe3Stogies Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,608
    Sorry to hear that Matt, rough start for the year for you man. Hope things get better, do they know the cause of your back pain?
    You can get counseling for yourself too, I did during my divorce. Just someone you feel comfortable with and can talk openly, sometimes you can't do that with friends or relatives.
  • BigshizzaBigshizza Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 10,949
    Damn Kuzi, so sorry to hear of your troubles. I hope all will work out and in the end it was a bad rough patch you faced. Need anything LMK
  • Bobbo2009Bobbo2009 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 843
    Well ***. I'm sorry to hear about all of this. I really don't know what to say, except hang in there. I really hope things work out for the best.
  • bert873bert873 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 854
    Sorry to hear that Kuzi. Just know we're all for ya if you need anything.
  • kaspera79kaspera79 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 7,144
    Sorry to hear this Matt. You know the guys here are always willing to listen when you feel like talking, and offer advice when you ask for that. So many members here are better brothers than our own blood, I see it every day. Time, Time, Time......It will get better. I know that sounds like a trivial statement, but I have been down that road, and know it is true. Stay strong, and know this family is always here for you Boss.
  • SasquatchSasquatch Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 228
    January sucked....It will only get better for you the rest of the year. Not being trite or anything, but stay positive and do not dwell on the negative. You will go mad trying to Monday morning QB every little thing. Remember you got Friends all across the map here.
  • webmostwebmost Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,131
    She does not deserve you.
  • Bob LukenBob Luken Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,664
    Sorry you are having such troubles Matt. I have not shared a lot of details on my personal troubles but I am lucky to have the forum here for me as a welcome distraction from the big mess that my life was during the past few years. I can certainly relate to what you have going on. If you need to vent or otherwise unload just let me know.
  • SM0K3YSM0K3Y Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 519
    Kuz,I hate to hear anyone hurting like that, be it family, friend or stranger. Stay strong brother, wishing positive karma your way man :)
  • RhamlinRhamlin Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,530
    Dam Matt that is really crappy news. As a guy who's been there a couple times though we've managed to work it out in the end I know how tough and stressful it is. I pray that if it can be worked out it will be and that your back pain will be healed. It's taken years but I've learned to live with mine for the most part.
  • ejgormanejgorman Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 891
    kuzi16:
    Jan 17th i was in a car accident. some kid hit me from behind. some damage to my car but i am now in constant pain through the length of my back. I have a lawyer on that, but the pain is constant and at its very best annoying.
    So sorry to hear Matt. I doubt the physical pain is your biggest concern, but ask your PI attorney if he can recommend a chiropractor. Sounds like you need one. My wife and I have had our problems, but luckily we've been able to work them out thus far. I can only imagine what you're going through. Thanks for answering all the unasked questions and know that we're all keeping you in our thoughts.
  • Dark RoastDark Roast Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 463
    Matt - Sorry to hear you are having a *** of a new year. Only advice I can give is take it a day at a time and keep moving forward. Eventually you will come out on the other side of this a much wiser man. Good Luck.
  • 90+ Irishman90+ Irishman Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 7,868
    Truly sorry to hear these terrible things Matt, will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers!
  • kuzi16kuzi16 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 14,471
    thank you everyone.
  • jgibvjgibv Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,996
    damn kuzi, sorry to hear about all this.
    i can't begin to imagine what it's like to go through that .... but if you need anything at all *you know* we've all got your back brother.

    try to stay positive, even if it's about something small ....
    keep your chin up bro, things will get better.
  • youngryan216youngryan216 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 868
    I dont know you too well Kuz, but you helped me become a part of this community and I will forever be in your debt for your kindness and guidance.

    Someone else said it already, but you should definitely remember to treat yourself well during this time brother. Best wishes for you.
  • CharlieHeisCharlieHeis Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,371
    Damn. Wish you well, Matt.
  • jd50aejd50ae Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,109
    Hope it all works out with you landing on your feet. Kinda puts my problems in perspective.
  • kuzi16kuzi16 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 14,471
    youngryan216:
    Someone else said it already, but you should definitely remember to treat yourself well during this time brother. Best wishes for you.
    im working on it. got plans for the house. may need some help from the forum. when i get there ill post about it.

    thanks again everyone. i hope to be back to some semblance of my self soon. get posting again and maybe even knock out a review or two.
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