Stuff
Vulchor
Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,176
I have been reading Ozzie and some other posts on here about issues with families, sickness, etc. and thought I would write one too. First, I feel for everyone going thru this stuff, as my family has been as well----but I have not written until now. Seems by not writing it is easier to deal sometimes, but I think getting it out and getting some good wishes will do good for my spirits and my family.
In January, my dad was taken via ambulance to the hospital with chest pain...no heart attack, but they did find a grapefruit sized tumor on his lung. He smoked pack a Marlboros a day for 35 years, and sure enough...Stage 4 lung cancer with mets to the lymph nodes in his armpit, and also in the shoulder and hip. No one would give a prognosis, but the stats said 1/2 of people with stage 4 would be dead within 6 months.
Well, its been 6 months today...and dad is alive. He has just finished chemo, and seen a 20% reduction in tumor size. He starts radiation in 2 weeks. He still works as he can (however he is in danger of losing his job because of hours) but is pretty positive. He has lost weight and is weak and nauseous...but still kicking. It has been, and continues to be, tough because everyone knows the ultimate outcome with Stage 4 lung cancer---and usually sooner than later. He has been staying with my wife, kids, and I about half the time as he goes to a cancer hospital near where we live. It has been a great break for my mom and sister to have time to process while he is with us..and also great for my babies to see grandpa so much, as they may not get to for too much longer----but we remain hopeful
Thanks to those of you (you know who you are) who did know about this and your prayers and good wishes. I know I can be a pr!ck here sometimes, but it is my place to enjoy smokes and talking alot, and also to get out some frustration and anger about life...sorry I sometimes do that at the expense of others. I love this board and everyone here for making the day always a little brighter for me and something to look forward to when some days are quite freakin grey. Sorry to burden everyone with this heavy stuff, but it feels good to put it out there and open up a little and I figure prayers and good wishes can only help. Thanks again to all of you....One Love.....Dave
In January, my dad was taken via ambulance to the hospital with chest pain...no heart attack, but they did find a grapefruit sized tumor on his lung. He smoked pack a Marlboros a day for 35 years, and sure enough...Stage 4 lung cancer with mets to the lymph nodes in his armpit, and also in the shoulder and hip. No one would give a prognosis, but the stats said 1/2 of people with stage 4 would be dead within 6 months.
Well, its been 6 months today...and dad is alive. He has just finished chemo, and seen a 20% reduction in tumor size. He starts radiation in 2 weeks. He still works as he can (however he is in danger of losing his job because of hours) but is pretty positive. He has lost weight and is weak and nauseous...but still kicking. It has been, and continues to be, tough because everyone knows the ultimate outcome with Stage 4 lung cancer---and usually sooner than later. He has been staying with my wife, kids, and I about half the time as he goes to a cancer hospital near where we live. It has been a great break for my mom and sister to have time to process while he is with us..and also great for my babies to see grandpa so much, as they may not get to for too much longer----but we remain hopeful
Thanks to those of you (you know who you are) who did know about this and your prayers and good wishes. I know I can be a pr!ck here sometimes, but it is my place to enjoy smokes and talking alot, and also to get out some frustration and anger about life...sorry I sometimes do that at the expense of others. I love this board and everyone here for making the day always a little brighter for me and something to look forward to when some days are quite freakin grey. Sorry to burden everyone with this heavy stuff, but it feels good to put it out there and open up a little and I figure prayers and good wishes can only help. Thanks again to all of you....One Love.....Dave
Comments
I was thinking about that the other day. It seems we are coming to a point in life where people around us like our parents will be suffering health problems or even dying. It's that crappy time of life where the old gaurd start to think of passing the ball on to the "next ones". One day it will be our turn. Let's hope we can pass it off as well as our parents did.
It's that circle of life thing bro'. Your dad and your family are in my thoughts Dave.
Dad is still alive, though things are getting worse. Chemo had worked well until about 2 months ago...now nothing. Tarveca was precribed, and was a $4,000 useless pill. He also suffered a heart attack 2 weeks ago, minor, but bad enough. He has lost more weight, more unsteady on his feet, and more tired than ever. Not sure of timeframes as he sees the oncologist tomorrow, but the end of the year would be hopeful at this point I think----and I hope like hell Im wrong, but maybe it would be better to end the pain. I think that I cant cry anymore or get any lower thinking about all this---and then the next day comes and it gets worse. Sorry to be the downer guys, just stressed knowing I have to go to Dr. with him tomorrow. Life moves so fast sometimes, cant slow it down....dont know if doing so would even be a good thing. Thanks for the wishes over the last months and year, just had to do a little catharsis this morning on here.
My wife lost her mom to lung cancer about two years ago at around this time of the year. It is rough.
I have thought about you and your dad's situation a few times since then, because Wendy never had the chance to say goodbye to her mom. She went to her mom and stayed with her for a week. When things looked like they were improving a bit she came home to wait for her eventual return to her mom's bedside. Instead when she got home (we live about 800 miles away) we got a phone call within 3 hours... her mom had passed.
I hope in your case that you have had time to spend with your dad and have had plenty of time to say your goodbyes. Some of us here are at the age when we have to start to face these types of things with our parents, one of lifes hard teachings, the circle is complete.
Contact me anytime bro' (you know that) by PM and unload anytime you feel the need.
Many BOTL's are thinking of you and your family, hang in there, and if this is the best way to relieve stress... Then DAMMIT you post every single HOUR!
You are in my thoughts and prayers
I guess I look at death a little different than many; including my wife. I've never really been hit hard by death, maybe it's because I was around so much in the Army and had seen so many close friends die. Maybe I just haven't had anyone super close die yet. Time will tell as my father will probably go before my mother and maybe I'll crack, I do not know. Again I really hope things turn out well for ya.
We remain optomistic yet honest with things, but the Dr. still wont mention death or timeframes...stating she hopes he is still around for my sisters high school graduation next year, but options are getting fewer..........So as it is with cancer, not great news...but not the worst we could have either. Its a f'in roller coaster man, an f'in roller coaster.