The Official Tim Blythe's Beard Appreciation Thread

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  • BStayer
    BStayer Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 318
    Tim's Beard for President 2012!!
  • fla-gypsy
    fla-gypsy Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,023
    It is only a matter of time before Tim's beard is immortalized on Mt Rushmore.
  • Dustin1981
    Dustin1981 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 410
    Tims beard is so high class that Tims beard gets into night clubs while Tim has to wait outside.
  • fla-gypsy
    fla-gypsy Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,023
    Tim's beard is so manly his cigars auto-ignite as they approach those straight ligero hairs.
  • JZ
    JZ Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 827
    .......................He is the 2nd most interesting man in the world! (Second to the Dos Equis Guy!!)
  • Krieg
    Krieg Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,068
    I just discovered this thread and I'd have to say I have been laughing my @ss off for the last 10min.
  • phobicsquirrel
    phobicsquirrel Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 7,349
    Krieg:
    I just discovered this thread and I'd have to say I have been laughing my @ss off for the last 10min.
    lol, me too!
  • Lasabar
    Lasabar Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,457
    Tim's Beard is so big it won't return Spielberg's calls

    Tim's Beard is so popular that Next *** Clark will countdown the dropping of Tim's Beard

    Tim once got punched in the beard... 5 days later the offender was diagnosed with Cancer

    When Tim was born the Beard was already at full mast, he rolled over, and started making everyone pancakes...

    Tim's beard never gets in the way of food, the food knows better than to stick to Tim's Beard
  • undulac
    undulac Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 1,129
    To get fuller and stronger, Tim's beard works out. . . but it doesn't do push ups, it actually pushes the earth down.

    Superman wear pajamas with Tim's beard on it.

    Tim's beard is what Willis was talkin about.

    Tim's beard played Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun. . . and won.

    Tim once pulled out a single hair from his beard and skewered three men through the heart with it

  • Redtailhawkoz
    Redtailhawkoz Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,914
    LOL I didnt know that this was you Tim! LOL Nice Beard!
  • jsnake
    jsnake Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,037
    Tim's beard has it's own holiday in 14 different countries.

    Tim's beard can cure any disease

    Tim's beard gives Chuck Norris nightmares

    Tim's beard delivers cigars to the true believing BOTL who celebrate The Great Beard Day on Feb 2nd. Just leave an empty gar box on your porch and believe!
  • Hays
    Hays Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,262
    jsnake:
    Tim's beard delivers cigars to the true believing BOTL who celebrate The Great Beard Day on Feb 2nd. Just leave an empty gar box on your porch and believe!
    Heck yeah...you'll be seeing an empty box on my porch February 2nd!!!
  • dennisking
    dennisking Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,681
    isn't that Groundhog's Day?? Wait, Tim's beard IS the groundhog
  • Hays
    Hays Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,262
    dennisking:
    isn't that Groundhog's Day?? Wait, Tim's beard IS the groundhog
    Yes, The Beard actually dictates ALL of the seasons, but the media figured that would fuc.k with people's minds too much so they fabricated the Groundhog bullshi.t
  • stephen_hannibal
    stephen_hannibal Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 4,317
    To make money in college Tim's Beard rented himself out as Donald Trumps comb over.
  • Dustin1981
    Dustin1981 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 410
    I just have to say that I was watching some of the old CCOM videos and I love the oldschool Tim fu manchu and mutton chops he was rocking in the intro.
  • These Filthy Hands
    These Filthy Hands Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 455
    Tim's beard hit .375 in the minors before hurting it's knee.

    Nothing Tim touches turns to gold. Instead, it grows a beard.
  • nightmaremike31
    nightmaremike31 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 720
    I love Tim's beard, it's totally bad ass. While searching the interwebs for things about beards... I found this...

    ... I don't know what to say.
  • Dustin1981
    Dustin1981 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 410
    nightmaremike31:
    I love Tim's beard, it's totally bad ass. While searching the interwebs for things about beards... I found this...

    ... I don't know what to say.
    Wow now that one hell of a beard
  • Luko
    Luko Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,004
    if ever something deserved a WTF, it is that...
  • kingjk729
    kingjk729 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,487
    That so totally deserves a monster WTF
  • dennisking
    dennisking Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,681
    Holy Freakshow. WOW is all I can say......
    Back on track, I heard that Tim's beard was actually Moses' beard and since the dawn of time, it has been passed down thru the Knights Templar to the next recipient. It, according to legend, is the Holy Grail.
  • Krieg
    Krieg Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,068
    Th only thing that strikes fear into Jack Bauer is the Beard of Tim.
  • nightmaremike31
    nightmaremike31 Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 720
    Blackbeard the Pirate is a nursery rhyme compared to The Legend of Tim's Beard!!
  • Jdorais
    Jdorais Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 653
    best.thread.ever.
  • cabinetmaker
    cabinetmaker Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 2,561
    nightmaremike31:
    I love Tim's beard, it's totally bad ass. While searching the interwebs for things about beards... I found this...

    ... I don't know what to say.
    when that guy's beard saw Tim's beard, it got so scared it formed a cage outta itself.
  • Jdorais
    Jdorais Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 653
    I honor of The Beard and since February 2nd is almost here I was thinking as a sacrifice to The Beard on that auspicious day, we should all change our avitar to The Beard.
  • dennisking
    dennisking Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,681
    Jdorais:
    I honor of The Beard and since February 2nd is almost here I was thinking as a sacrifice to The Beard on that auspicious day, we should all change our avitar to The Beard.
    i like this idea. it's national tim's beard day
  • jsnake
    jsnake Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 5,037
    If your beard had $5 and Tim's Beard had $5, Tim's Beard would have more money then you.

    Tim's Beard built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Tim met all three bullets with The Beard, deflecting them.
    JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

    There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Tim's Beard has allowed to live.

    Tim's Beard is the only person to ever win a staring contest against Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder at the same time.

    Tim's Beard is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.

    It takes Tim's Beard 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
  • fla-gypsy
    fla-gypsy Everyone, Registered Users Posts: 3,023
    Tim's beard is so unique on a molecular level it has been declared a new Element. Beardium will now be added to the atomic chart and is the marvel of the scientific community. It is 10x stronger thanTitanium and heavier than depleted Uranium.