A long time back, I acquired a Padilla Artemis double torpedo box pressed beautiful cigar. It has lived in my humidor just about since I scored that box. Kept it in the top tray. Each time I opened the lid I admired the pure unadulterated gorgeousness of this stick. Should've left it there.
Instead, this afternoon, after we waved goodbye to our weekend house guest Cal, I sparked lovely Artemis up. There was good reason to celebrate. For one thing, Cal, who I had never met before, turned out to be a real quality boon companion. Next, he turned out to be good with his hands, so that between the two of us, a job which usually requires all weekend to complete, well we started at six on Friday and wrapped up by six last night. His bike was also a beautiful specimen of machinery to work on, being a perfectly preserved shining BMW chrome head R1200C. That's the very BMW model included in the Guggenheim Museum's travelling Art of the Motorcycle show. Wonderful rolling sculpture in glossy schwartz mit weiss. Incredibly, the whole project also went off without a single hitch, which just never happens on this big a job. Last but not least, Unbeknownst to us, Cal's son had recently been in an accident which left him a quad, was miraculously on the way to recovery, and Cal, of course, was footing the bills so his son wouldn't lose his house and all, so that this project turned out serendipity all around. To top it all off, as we sat at breakfast this morning after a test ride, another motorcycle friend dropped by our table, requiring help with a starter relay, so I nor had a new project for today.
So I was in an expansive mood. Swapped out the relay. Came home to the man cave. Yanked old Artemis from her honey hole. Almost seven inches long. 56 gauge. Marvelous symmetry of construction. Wonderful wrapper. Obviously, no blackwash needed to obscure this reddish marbled color. Enticing cedar and barn aroma. Tasty creamy cedar flavor. A bit light, ad too fat for my taste; but otherwise a cylindrical sotweed work of art.

Cut both ends off. Free and easy draw. Cedar and barn all up my nose. Really looking forward to burning this stick. Fired it up with one match. Aaaaahhh! Creamy super smooth cedar, clean finish, wonderful aroma, great volume.
If you like this stick, you will want to stop reading right here.
You were warned. This stick had the worst gotdamt burn I have ever seen. Can you believe it, this thing tunneled so bad and so fast that it put itself out before the cherry even burnt up the tapered part! That's right, within the first ten minutes. Great first ten, then havoc. First it would burn up one side, then it would burn up the other side, then it would go out. Over and over.
About four matches in, I took to hitting it hard and steady to keep it lit. That pace beat the cream right out of the cedar and left it turn sour. I've had better flavor with no burn problems from a six bit FX Smith Natural. Many times. Six matches in, I eventually gave up and cut the end off to start all over again. Still wouldn't burn right. Ten matches in, I just gave up entirely and chucked it.
Ought to have left it right where it was, on the top tray, where I could admire it from afar.
I am hard pressed to give this one star out of five.